Children

On September 01, 2010 I became a daddy for the third time! I have to say that the Lord in all His mercies, has blessed my wife and I tremendously! He has given us three beautiful children and entrusted their care to us.

You know really and truly, had you asked me a few years ago (probably longer than that) if I wanted three kids, I would have been quick to answer..."NO"! But now these little ones are here, if you asked me, do you think and your wife will have more...I'd have to say "I honestly don't know". And that's not a cop out to basically say no...that's being honest and leaving it up to the Lord. He's provided thus far for my wife, me and our children...why should we stop trusting in Him now? I would like to place a caveat on these statements...I really and truly don't want 8, 10, 15, 20 kids...really I don't...but...the Lord is merciful and He knows exactly what we can and can not bear...more than we do, so I'm trusting that he will either change my heart and grow my faith or meet me exactly where I am and allow us to be a three to four child family. It really is crazy though. As I'm typing this, I know the time will come that I miss having a little one curled up on my chest, asleep, trying to get as close to me as they can...ohh how I love that!

I was thinking back just a minute ago on how I used to be pro choice. I never really spent a lot of time around children (not talking babies...5-9 year olds)...and the few I had been around, really made me NOT want to have any! The even fewer babies (1) I had been around, honestly, drove me crazy! I was convinced that theis little poop factory hated me! I worked overnight and as I laid down to sleep, the little monster, ALWAYS cried and screamed! I decided then and there that a baby was one of the worst things that could EVER happen to anyone! I remember when I thought a girl I was dating was pregnant, one of the first things that I thought of was getting $300.00 or thereabouts together and going to the neighborhood abortionist and sucking the little life out of her. Sadly, I didn't see anything wrong with this. I continued to view abortion as just another means of contraception. I mean really, from my perspective, this little thing didn't have any feelings...how could it right? It was so tiny and undeveloped (and if I'm honest, it being developed wouldn't have mattered because we are creatures of convenience and comfort and a baby would have disrupted both of those things for me)...how could it have feelings? How could it be anything more than a "mistake" (to quote our current president)?

When I found the Lord, I don't even think I struggled with the above ideology changing. I looked around and saw children and babies and all of a sudden, something clicked within me...these little things are a miracle! Every time I heard one of them cry, I thought...how much more do they scream when they are being sucked apart? To see the little tears fall from their eyes when they get hurt, I thought...how much more do they cry because the one's that should love them the most are offering them up for convenience? I heard their little voices and would wonder what all the others that were sacrificed on the alter of the "Amercian Way" would have sounded like? I think sometimes...how would this country be different if these children were allowed to be born? If these children were allowed to taste life like those that stole it from them? I think how can we call ourselves a free country when we murder those with no voice and proclaim it's a choice?

I look in my childrens eyes and I am sorry for all of the stupid things I used to think. I see them and sometimes I tear up because if they had come along earlier in my life, there's no guarantee that they would be here now. I hear their sweet little voices and it melts me on the inside. I look into their eyes and see colors and depths that can only be matched by the heavens that our Lord inhabits. I feel their little fingers wrap around one of mine and know that there is no choice. After having these wonderful gifts given to me by the Lord, I can honeslty say that the only choice I am pro in now is Life...there is no other choice.

I am so thankful that my heavenly father has changed me. I am so happy that He has given me a beautiful woman to love and cherish. I am so thankful that He casts my transgressions as far as the east is from the west. I am thankful that He has chosen to bless my wife and I with LIFE! He has given that to us both eternally and through children. When we are gone, our legacy can live on through them as the Lord's does through us.

Thank you father for your grace and mercy in our lives!